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Vijay Mehta
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xx Have you been victimised?
« Thread started on: Aug 2nd, 2004, 7:12pm »

If you have been victimised in the past go ahead and post your story here. You may change your name and identifying information but keep the key facts as factual as possible. We might even ask few experts in field to advise you and help you out.

First step to healing is stop being victim and take charge of your life

good luck

Vijay Uncle
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xx Re: Have you been victimised?
« Reply #1 on: Nov 21st, 2007, 10:58pm »

I have not been victimized, but I would like to say I know that many young teens and young adults do set themselves to potentially get victimized by men.
I know that many women go with friends when going to the bar, but how many of these people in the group are drunk by the end of the night?
Whose there that is not drunk to ensure everyone in the group is safe?
Do these women come home by train, car, if so whose watching them to making sure they get home safe?
For example by train, are they able to just walk to safely get home without some stranger taking advantage of them?
For car, whose the designated car if not do the people call a taxi cab to safely drop them home?
Do the women purchase the drink themselves or ask someone else like a stranger to get the drink for them?
If a stranger, that person can slip a date rape drug inside the drink.
How much personal information do these women give to strangers they meet at the club whether they are desi or not? Do they go with them to the strangers car or spend time with them later on?
How much trust do women have on their boyfriends or new guy friend?
Even the nicest or the guy that we know can victimized you.
Are women worried about their personal safety that not all men are respectful and can rape or even murder a person?

I know many women date and go to clubs, but I ask myself how many are responsible when it comes to their safety?

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xx Re: Have you been victimised?
« Reply #2 on: Nov 21st, 2007, 11:36pm »

I think with the lack of respect media has for women has greatly influenced the treatment of women by men.
Now women are considered as sex objects. I think from the time Reena wrote this article to now. I think more women have exposed themselves and got so much into the party life, its like how many actually spend themselves not doing an activity that doesn't involve alcohol. Our community has everything alcohol involved if you go to a party or a club, drinks, go to a trip like Vegas or Bahamas, drinks involved, it seems like too much drinking and physical exposure involved today.
Sadly, there are few good role models for young girls. Now even our 12-13 years feel pressured to being skinny, pretty, having a boyfriend, and becoming popular. If they have their first alcohol drink they consider themselves "cool". Even though our desi people having been caught by law for younger age drinking or many involved in accidents. But the truth is Desi people just like every other community of people are now part of the statistic where binge drinking, younger age drinking, clubbing, rape, and all exists.
I don't think times have changed since Reena article since 2004, instead it seems everyone is partying and getting drunk. This is the message the younger desi's get from seeing the reaction, the pictures of facebook or friendster of people's personal party life.
I have to say Desi's are poor role models for younger Desi or children in general. I dont care how many become dr, rx, or whatever if anything i saw these years more people willing to compromise their values or using smart jugdment.
These same men and women who had so much fun in college or high school years drinking. I wouldnt be much surprised half of you needing AA meeting to get you out of your alcohol addiction.
If not one day it will be your child sneaking beers in the house and getting buzzed.
Desi's can be so educated and all, but one thing I see many have compromised their values.
You can have all the money, education, friends, fancy clothes, but one thing is for sure values is the key thing that cant be match to all these things. Values stand out alone. I think many desi people have lost values. Instead of doing right things many have learned to go after money, looks, fame, drinks, and lying and all.
So sad how many desi people have become.
Reena may have written this article a while back, but you know many still don't learn from it.
I still think Reena is the best for writing this article and those that helped acknowledge this serious topic.
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xx Re: Have you been victimised?
« Reply #3 on: Nov 21st, 2007, 11:43pm »

Correction...
Even though our desi people have NOT been caught by law for younger age drinking or many involved in accidents. But the truth is Desi people just like every other community of people are now part of the statistic where binge drinking, younger age drinking, clubbing, rape, and all exists.

If anything these clubs have helped to increase in divorce rates because it seems people are hooking up and all. They don't learn much because they are too buzzed to learn about real dating. People are dating and having relationships simply because that environment encourages it.
This increased more drinking from ages 30-12 years.
I wouldn't be surprised many still continuing to do binge and irresponsible drinking in marriage years.
I think Desi people have lost it to the american or western media influences.
I feel sorry that women feel they got to be pretty in order to have a guy to like them. I feel sorry for these women they feel so trapped by what others and media expect of them. It clearly shows how FAKE Desi people have become just like the other communities whom they decided to follow.

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xx Re: Have you been victimised?
« Reply #4 on: Nov 27th, 2007, 6:07pm »

I think all people should start addressing these issues by talking with your own children, to grandchildren, social gatherings, other parents, writing and talking with media, and so forth. It's time that Desi People acknowledge bad things rather than hiding them.
If more people openly talked about these serious issues it would have prevented a teen from drinking Vodka, or two Desi teens or college students from having sex, and all. If anything communication helps people to making smart decisions. Lack of communication only creates and have an ongoing problem. I think People should talk about Desi rape, Underage drinking, Party Life, Premartial sex in our desi youth. Be like VijayKaka Talk!!!
I think this is what helps to keep our Desi community solid for many generations. Not being silent and thinking Desi youth don't do bad things like their American friends.


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